{"id":396,"date":"2012-03-01T01:31:59","date_gmt":"2012-03-01T07:31:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/allisonwatts.com\/blog\/?p=396"},"modified":"2020-12-24T16:01:34","modified_gmt":"2020-12-24T22:01:34","slug":"transformational-dental-practice-excellence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/allisonwatts.com\/transformational-dental-practice-excellence\/","title":{"rendered":"Transformational Dental Practice Excellence"},"content":{"rendered":"
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The Story of Beingness
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by Allison Watts, DDS
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It’s fun to be sharing about something I love–the behavioral and the relationship part of dentistry. I did a presentation at my Pankey study club about this and thought I’d share it here with you. Feedback and sharing is appreciated! <\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/div>\n

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A couple of months ago, I had one of those moments in my practice<\/strong> where I looked over at my assistant and said, “That was really fun!” I noticed it wasn’t related to dental treatment, it was more behavioral. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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“Bill” was definitely stuck.<\/strong> He really believed that he couldn’t do the dentistry he wanted because he was planning to retire and he had saved his money for retirement so that his house would be paid for. He was going to choose a compromised treatment plan and one that he really didn’t want when I made a simple comment, “Sounds like you have a difficult choice to make.” <\/strong>He looked at me with one of those ah-hah moment looks that said OMG, you’re right–I do have a choice. I love these ah-hah moments, where we help someone see a possibility they couldn’t see before. I truly enjoy interrupting their “stuck” thinking pattern by offering them the possibility of something different and better, usually by asking a simple question…<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/em><\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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The most fun I have in my practice really is sitting with a patient who is learning<\/strong> about themselves and their mouth with me and then sees possibilities different from any they ever saw before. When we sit with people and let them have their emotions while staying present with them, it creates safety and connection. If we feel comfortable and connected, they likely feel it too.<\/em> Then at the appropriate time, we can ask them questions that allow them to examine their own beliefs, values and choices, etc. I believe this is a gift we give our selves and our patients. It is important that it is done in a loving way, not manipulative.<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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In order to get to this point, I had to learn about myself and others at a deeper level<\/strong> and it has allowed me to change more lives more often, which is why I got into dentistry.<\/strong><\/em> When I first started practicing and I was learning how to communicate with my patients and my team, I was mostly taught tools, as I’m sure you all were. I used these tools. They were great and got me started right. I still use these tools (unconsciously now) like knee-to-knee, reflective listening, eye contact, mask and gloves off, etc<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Now I have been able to go way beyond the “tools” that I had learned earlier in my career. <\/strong>This is because over the last five or six years, I’ve attending a lot of personal growth workshops that had “nothing to do with dentistry” and everything to do with dentistry.<\/strong><\/em> The awareness I’ve had through all this coaching and personal growth has helped me in my practice and my life. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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Years ago, Dr. Pankey shared his philosophy and the importance of knowing your work, knowing yourself, knowing your patients and applying your knowledge. When I went to Pankey, I had already been working hard on knowing my work and applying my knowledge, but not so hard on knowing myself and my patients. I thought<\/b> I knew myself and my patients, but there were deeper layers that I wasn’t’ even aware of. Striving for this deeper understanding and level of relating has given me much more fulfillment in my practice and I know my team would say the same. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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The reason I enjoy what I do so much is really because I get to talk to my team and my patients every day about possibilities<\/strong>. Possibilities are one of my favorite topics and part of my value system.<\/span><\/span> We have this opportunity because we have chosen to be excellent not just in our clinical skills, but our communication and listening skills as well. <\/span><\/span><\/em><\/div>\n
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I really started down this path in 2002,<\/strong> when my coach said, “You’ve invested a lot in clinical excellence and you know you can deliver the dentistry.   Now, you need to learn to communicate better and to really understand people and what they really want so you can truly help them. If you communicate well, you will also help your patients accept your best and finest care.”<\/em> Thank you, Bob and all my coaches and mentors for helping me get on and stay on this path! Also, thank you to my team for going on this journey with me. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Many of my teachers from the Pankey Institute have impacted my learning related to connection and listening. Some of the biggies are Bob Frazer, Mary Osborne, Joan Unterschuetz and Herb Blumenthal. I’ve seen many very competent and skilled communicators demonstrate “deep” listening. I strive to listen to my team, my patients and my family at a different level today than I even knew was possible.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Here are some keys to<\/strong> powerful listening<\/b>:<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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1. Be present\/focus<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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2. Listen with no judgement<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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3. Watch your filters\/stories<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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4. Put down your agendas<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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You may have heard these things before, but for me some of them were new and very powerful distinctions. I hope I can relate this to you in a meaningful way!<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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Be present<\/b>, attentive and focused. Be present means, don’t listen to your own internal dialogue – your bodily needs, judgments about yourself or the other. Don’t be distracted by worries, daydreams, your story about them, this issue or yourself. BE WITH THEM.<\/strong> Watch their tone and inflection, face and body language and listen to what they are saying and not saying. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Listen with no judgment.<\/b> This one has taken me into the area of knowing myself. In order for me to have no judgment, I have to clean up my own stuff, which is where judgment comes from.   This means not having a preconceived idea of what they’re going to say or a story about them, what they do, what they think, etc… Be aware of projections. Projections are when we think our feelings, etc are their feelings. There’s much more about projections, but that will be another article.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Watch your filters\/stories. <\/b>Very similar to judgement, but filters are probably more ingrained, like stories about who that person is and what they will and won’t do. Filters are how we listen to others. We probably listen to different people through different filters at different times. Filters may be things like: “I know”, so you don’t hear them, “this patient can’t afford it”, “he doesn’t care about his teeth”, etc. How are you listening to this person?<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Put down your agendas.<\/b> Agendas are what you want for yourself from the person or the circumstance. Examples are: needing to be liked or the outcome you want for the client or something you “need” to have happen.   There are agendas we are aware of and communicate upfront and there are hidden agendas and unconscious agendas.   Accept that we have no idea what is really best for someone else and they’re not wrong if they choose what we wouldn’t. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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It has only been recently that I realized that it’s not really what<\/b> we say or do…. it’s who we’re being. It has been life-changing for me to recently spend time with Herb Blumenthal, where I experienced a new level of “beingness”<\/b>. It was as if he was “holding” the patient the entire time, making them feel safe and cared for. He was quite connected with them. Here’s what I think makes Herb special and what I strive to do when communicating with everyone in my life (some of these are similar to the keys to powerful listening above). I will call these the steps to exceptional “beingness”. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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1. Be extraordinarily present-<\/strong> self-awareness so that no distractions, filters, stories, agendas get in the way of being with the patient. We need to learn to shut everything else off.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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2. Authentic connection-<\/strong> truly see them, like in Avatar… I see you, I get you. Also, let them see you. Be vulnerable and real. <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
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3. Confidence and humility- <\/span><\/span><\/strong> know your work (be highly competent) and your limitations. Tempering these two things makes for good boundaries and clarity about responsibility.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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4. Accepting and loving- <\/strong>really accepting them without judgment or story. Know that they are a unique person and that they know what’s best for themselves. Trust them to make the best decision for themselves. Value them as a person, with beliefs, desires and values (that may be different than yours).<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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5. Calling them higher-<\/strong> Ask them to step up. Call them to their highest potential. Help them see possibilities beyond what they’ve seen. Positive expectation for them<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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As I think about the patient above, who we were able to help see a different possibility, it inspires me.<\/strong> I am so happy to be a part of him being able to choose something better for himself. “Bill” has chosen to move forward with records and consultations with specialists and to figure out a way to do something better for himself. I know we helped him by being present, connected, confident\/humble, accepting him and calling him higher. Doing these things makes dentistry fun! And it is truly life-changing for the patients, not just in their oral health, but in their life!   I enjoy helping the dentists that I work with in coaching and teaching at The Pankey Institute learn these skills… 
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Best to you as you try some of these skills! Have fun!<\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/div>\n
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Connect with me on Facebook <\/a><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/div>\n

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\"\"<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Story of Beingness by Allison Watts, DDS   It’s fun to be sharing about something I love–the behavioral and the relationship part of dentistry. I did a presentation at my Pankey study club about this and thought I’d share it here with you. Feedback and sharing is appreciated!  A couple of months ago, I had one […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":403,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_cloudinary_featured_overwrite":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[310,22,25,4,24,3,27,26],"tags":[12,141,139,140,137,136,135,143,142,138,82],"yoast_head":"\nTransformational Dental Practice Excellence - The Story Of Beingness<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dental patients get better results and make better treatment choices when they are exposed to "exceptional beingness" by the dentist they are working with.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/allisonwatts.com\/transformational-dental-practice-excellence\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Allison Watts\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"9 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/allisonwatts.com\/transformational-dental-practice-excellence\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/allisonwatts.com\/transformational-dental-practice-excellence\/\",\"name\":\"Transformational Dental Practice Excellence - 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